‘Twas the Night Before the Outage

‘Twas the night before the outage, when all through the plant,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a Gantt. 
The tubes were hung by the stack with care, 
In hopes that all the contractors soon would be there. 
The accountants were nestled all snug in their beds, 
While visions of lower costs danced in their heads. 
And Operations in their permits, and I in my cap, 
Had just settled our brains for a long nights nap. 

When out in the lot there arose such a clatter, 
I sprang from the office to see what was the matter. 
Away to the window I flew like a flash, 
Tore open the blinds and threw up the sash. 
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow 
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below. 

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, 
But a Winnebago, and eight trailers being towed in the rear. 
With a little old driver, so lively and curt, 
I knew in a moment it must be The Outage Expert. 
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came, 
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name! 

“Now Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen! 
On, Comet! On, Cupid! on, on Donner and Blitzen! 
To the top of the dancefloor! to the top of the wall! 
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!” 

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly, 
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky. 

So up to the boiler house the coursers they flew,
With the trailers full of Tubes, and The Outage Expert too. 
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the boiler 
The clanging and banging of each little toiler. 

As I drew in my head, and was turning around, 
Down the stack The Outage Expert came with a bound. 
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot, 
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot. 
A bundle of Tubes he had flung on his back, 
And he looked like a peddler, just opening his pack. 

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry! 
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry! 
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, 
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow. 
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, 
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath. 
He had a broad face and a little round belly, 
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly! 

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf, 
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself! 
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head, 
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread. 
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work, 
And filled all the holes, then turned with a jerk. 
And laying his finger aside of his nose, 
And giving a nod, up the stack he rose! 

He sprang to his Winnebago, to his team gave a whistle, 
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle. 
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight, 
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!” 

From all of us at The Outage Expert 

Just a bit of fun,
Happy Holidays everyone!